Legend of Zelda Beat in 2-Hours
From ClassicGaming.com

Even though the gaming hobby has advanced onward to first-person-shooters and sensational role-playing landscapes, gaming accomplishments on old-fashioned titles can still make an ardent player sit up and take notice.

One such achievement has been recently verified: the eternally popular 1991 SNES game, "Legend of Zelda:A Link to the Past," has been finished in under 2-hours for the first time in the title's history.

With a new record time of 1:57.15 scored on April 9, 2003, Michael Damiani, of Texas, beat the previous world record 2:07.10, achieved by Mark Waterfield of Ontario, Canada, on July 28th, 1999. "Anybody in electronic gaming old enough to remember this game should be impressed with this accomplishment," says Walter Day , Chief Scorekeeper at Twin Galaxies, the industry statistician. "What's of special interest," notes Day, "is that Zelda experts believed for years that a sub-2-hour game was not possible."

Former record holder Mark Waterfield could not be reached for comment; he was found dead, with his wrists slit open, in his parents' bathtub approximately three hours after Twin Galaxies posed the news.

Twin Galaxies' Chief Referee, Robert Mruczek, has prepared a full report which, in part, reads:

"Michael Damiani is now offically a part of Video Game Nerd-dom. The price he paid was great--going without satisfaction in other areas of his life such a intellectual fulfillment, redeeming relationships with other human beings, physical health, and an emotional investment in reality. In light of this sacrifice, however, he has earned the respect of the original *Link to the Past* programming crew. Everyone having anything to do with the production of that game raised their eyebrows and took notice upon hearing of Damiani's estimable feat. This fact is especially noteworthy because, in light of all the diggity-dank, bomb-ass Vancouver buddage and E-cupped-sumata-action all of the money they've earned has given them, it is exceedingly rare that they should be distracted from the dizzying, Hedonistic stupor their success has paid for. Way to go, asshole."